When loving monsters . . .
I did not realize until these later years how I keep trying to love monsters. I don’t realize they are monsters until it’s too late. What I have learned is you try to love what you learned as a child. You get used to a certain feeling and you mistake the familiarity of that feeling with love. For the longest time, I could not figure out how was it possible that I loved monsters because I don’t recall any monsters when I was growing up. But as a child, when a monster is all you know, you don’t realize a monster is a monster. We all have monsters within us. We all have the choice to unleash the monster within us or to instead keep the monster contained to keep others from getting hurt. I just wish I could recognize the monsters in others as well as I recognize the monster within me. Because I am tired of loving monsters. The monsters have taken all I have. I just have to look at it as a blessing that having “everything taken” at least lightens the load for the path to come so I surrender. I surrender to better, I surrender to love, I surrender to kindness. Goodbye monsters.